Courtside Forever Episode 7 | Merry Christmas
When I grew up, Christmas was magical. I mean, a lot of kids feel like Christmas is magical, so what’s the big deal, right? You’ve probably got a point, but to this day, I love the Christmas season.
If you follow me on social media, you’ve probably seen me doing my annual Christmas movie reviews.
Essentially every year. I spend November and December watching Christmas movies and rating them, but I don’t just rate them like “Oh, this movie was good, you should watch it.”
No way. Each movie is given an overall rating, but most importantly, a subcategory rating, and there are ten subcategories. Let’s go through them all.
Storyline - How good is the script that we’re working with here
Acting - Are we talking Meryl Streep or that lady from the Life Alert commercial?
Predictability - Self explanatory
Chemistry of leads - A one is like Reese Witherspoon and Ashton Kutcher in Your Place Or Mine. A five means am I watching an affair?
Cheesiness - I’m not talking about brie. This is typically where I count how many times I say “Are you serious right now?” and build my score on that.
Flannel - How much flannel appears on screen?
Diversity - How many white people appear on screen?
Business References - High powered lawyer, Marketing Executives, Is Grandma’s Quilt Making Business Threatened by the Big Quilt Industry? High steaks baby.
Snow - The more snow the better. Stuck in a snowstorm that might prevent you from missing Christmas? Even better.
Love Triangles - This is the best category. Give me a choice. Small town rancher who never left town, except on January 6th, or Big City Executive who definitely drives a Cybertruck.
Now when it comes to the final rating, each movie is rated 1 to 5, but this is what you need to know.
You’ve got Hallmark movies, Netflix movies, and Hollywood Studio movies. A Preacher’s Wife? Five stars, easy. Come on, it’s got Denzel in it.
But a Hallmark Movie might get a five star too. Is Cameron Mathison on the same level as Denzel? No, but do I walk into Jack in the Box expecting Wagyu Steak Burgers with Truffles and Carmalized Onions? Also no. Give me an Ultimate Cheeseburger with 2 Tacos, and chances are if you don’t forget my curly fries, I’m having a good time.
I love doing these Christmas movie reviews because I love the Christmas season. They’re silly, for sure, but it’s a way for me to connect with the joy of the season.
And while there is no hidden reason why I enjoy writing these reviews, I know that Christmas isn’t super joyful for everyone.
It’s stressful, it’s expensive. When I used to work retail, I would laugh over the last minute shoppers and the people who were straight up awful to one another around Jesus’s birthday.
Do you remember the tickle me Elmo fiasco? Parents would straight up assault another human being over the chance to get an Elmo doll that laughed when you tickled it. It’s a weird season. It can be a depressing season.
But as a kid, the season was magical. Growing up in upstate, NY, we almost always had snow on the ground come Christmas day.
Stewart’s shops had the best eggnog around somehow, my single mom always kept the Christmas spirit alive in our home.
She’s who made Christmas what it was to me. She is the one who kept the magic alive in our home.
I want my girls to know that magic so bad. I want my girls to feel that Christmas love, even if my wife and I don’t get the credit we deserve this time of year.
There is hope in the season, whether it’s honoring the birth of Jesus, the miracle of Hanukkah, or the celebration of Kwanza. It’s a time to reflect on the years past, and even if the year didn’t quite go our way, there is hope in knowing that next year is right around the corner.
The Christmas season is whatever you like it to be, which is maybe why I love these Hallmark movies so much. You’ve got the most unrealistic events happening, folks falling in love within five business days after spending five years with their previous fiancé. It’s wonderful, I don’t care what any of you liars say.
Anyway, Merry Christmas everyone. I couldn’t be more grateful for the community we’re building because Lord knows how much we need community right now.
Thanks for reading because as parents, we’ve got the best seats in the house. Let’s enjoy them.