Nobody’s Being Emasculated, Harrison

Some feel that today’s culture is emasculating men. It’s not, but there are men who are emasculating themselves.

Recently, Kansas City Chief’s Kicker, Harrison Butker, has been in the news. Not because of his phenomenal skill on the field, but because of his comments off it.

On May 11, 2024, Butker gave the commencement speech at Benedictine College in Atchison, KS. During his speech, the two time Super Bowl Champ took time to address a major concern of his with the recent graduates.

“For the ladies present today, congratulations on an amazing accomplishment,” he said. “You should be proud of all that you have achieved to this point in your young lives. I want to speak directly to you briefly because I think it is you, the women, who have had the most diabolical lies told to you.”

The son of Elizabeth Butker, an accomplished medical physicist at Emory University, went on to say

“I’m beyond blessed with the many talents God has given me but it cannot be overstated that all of my success is made possible because a girl I met in band class back in middle school would convert to the faith and become my wife and embrace one of the most important titles of all — homemaker,”

To be clear, these lines were met with a lot of applause, so apparently, the message was at least decently received. I wasn’t the intended audience so who cares what I think, right?

But in a speech that sounded more like a Campaign Launch than a commencement speech, Butker also urged the male graduates to “be unapologetic in [their] masculinity” and encouraged them to “fight against the cultural emasculation of men.”

I’m sorry, but why does it feel like any man who rails against the “emasculation of men” is the softest, whiniest, weakest man on earth? Goodness, it’s embarrassing.

There is no cultural emasculation of men. It’s made up — fiction. It doesn’t exist.

What men like Butker fail to realize is that for our entire lives, some men have taken advantage of their positions in businesses, politics, churches, etc. If you want resources, I can give you resources, but for a long time, far too many men in power have abused their status, and far too few men have been held accountable for their actions.

So today, when accountability occurs, or people are simply fed up with historical versions of masculinity (think misogynistic jokes, all-male boardrooms, etc.), men like Butker think that men are being emasculated.

Harrison, what?

How weak do you have to be to find accountability emasculating?

Truly, how soft is your ego that you can’t handle a simple conversation about boundaries?

How unbelievably fragile is your sexuality that the presence of LGBTQ+ folks feels threatening to you?

I know what the Bible says. Funny enough, I love me some Jesus, too, but there is a lot of context missing when it comes to this argument.

Harrison Butker is physically stronger than I will ever be. He’s also better at his job than I am at mine. But oh my goodness, to use your platform to rail against Pride Month, women who work, contraceptives, and the imaginary emasculation of men is not even remotely masculine, Godly, or clever.

I’ve talked about masculinity before, and as more and more young men are radicalized into believing this “emasculating” nonsense, I’ll likely talk about it again. And while a Professional Football player is probably a more “manly” profession than a Writer or HR Professional, at least I’m not afraid of women with jobs.

“I’ve seen firsthand how much happier someone can be when they disregard the outside noise and move closer and closer to God’s will for life. Isabelle’s dream of having a career might not have come true, but if you ask her today if she has any regrets on her decision, she would laugh out loud without hesitation and say no.”

Harrison, I just need an ounce of self-awareness, my guy. Saying this after earning over $20 million in your seven-year career could qualify this speech as a Netflix comedy special. Do you know how happy most people would be if their spouse earned millions of dollars a year to play a children’s game?

Masculinity is not under attack. It never has been, and it never will be. What we’re seeing right now is the weakest people on earth struggle with the concept of accountability and that is a personal problem they need to wrestle within themselves.

Do some people take it too far? Of course. That’s how the world works. There are 8 billion people, and some of them aren’t so great.

But take a step back for a second. Do men still earn far more than women for the same jobs? Do men still hold the majority of elected positions in America? Is it just that society has deemed it uncool to make sexist jokes and discriminate against women in the workplace? Yeah, man, men aren’t being emasculated — you’re doing it to yourself.

I think marrying a girl you met in Middle School is really cool. I bet Butker’s kids feel that he is an amazing dad. The first time I heard of Harrison Butker was when Lisa Lopez-Galvan was shot and killed at a Kansas City Chief’s Super Bowl parade while wearing his jersey.

Upon hearing the news, Butker donated a jersey to Lisa’s family and shared a heartfelt post dedicated to her. Lisa’s family chose to bury her in his donated jersey. By many accounts, Harrison Butker seems to care deeply about people, even if I disagree with some of his reasoning.

But we’ve got to stop equating the questioning of historical or traditional masculinity with “the process of making a man feel less male by taking away his power and confidence.”

If introspective conversations take away your power, then, brother, you never had any to begin with.